Posted tagged ‘game recap’

Urban Tribe Trounces the Emmit Otter Jug Band

October 7, 2009

CHICAGO – Three runs in the first inning.

Six runs in the fourth.

Five more in the sixth.

The Urban Tribe (3-1) rounded the bases at a dizzying pace and achieved their second slaughter rule defeat with a 16 – 3 rout of Emmits (2-2).

“This is something freaky. You won’t see anything like this again for a long, long time. I am glad I was on this end of it,” said John Kelly, who kicked one of two UT home runs in the game.

With the score tied at 0-0, the Urban Tribe couldn’t be stopped. Each member of the team finally gelled at the same time.

“It was great to perform so well in front of our fans,” bench coach Joggler said. A record attendance was set with over 6 fans watching the UT dominate.

It was the ninth time a major kickball league team scored 16 runs, and the first since the Chicago Colts set the league mark in a 36-7 rout of Louisville on June 29, 1897, according to the Elias Sports Bureau.

“It was AMAZING in capital letters,” said Lindsay, who had two hits and three RBIs after being called up from Triple-A Oklahoma earlier this season.

Hours after announcing general manager Denim would return for the 2010 season, the Urban Tribe handed out the second most lopsided spanking in franchise history and set a team record for runs scored in two games (34).

The UT had not broken the 15 run barrier in any of their previous nine games.

“I knew we’d get the legs going, but I never expected anything like this,” Gould said. “When the faucet is on, you want it to stay on. You never want to cut it off.”

The Urban Tribe set a team record for hits in an early October game with 23.

“You don’t want to be the one to make the out. You feel like you have to get a hit every time up,” Ditka said, who had 2 runs scored with a double and an RBI.

Christine and Melissa, the bottom two girl kickers in the UT’s lineup, each had two hits and scored two runs.

“That was ridiculous. I have never been in anything like that in my life,” said Melissa, who went 2-for-3 raising her kicking average over 200 points!
Ryan & Architect had four of the UT’s 23 hits, the most by a major kickball team since Milwaukee had 31 in a 22-2 victory over Toronto on Aug. 28, 1992, according to ESPN sports.

The Urban Tribe had 39 at-bats, tying the record for a six-inning game set by Milwaukee in its 1992 rout of Toronto.

The UT added twenty five points to their team batting average, raising it to .582 on the season. They finished with more runs than outs made (18).

They could’ve finished with one more but Brewmaster was pegged in the foot at home. “I still can’t believe that ball beat me to the plate,” said Brewmaster who was winded by the sprint from first base.

Emmits went from 3rd in the league with a 5.44 ERA to 6th at 9.30.

Asked how to handle such a devastating defeat, Emmit’s pitcher replied, “You have a real short memory and you let it go.”

Joggler (3-1) allowed three runs and seven hits over six innings. He managed to set a kickball league record by downing his third opponent with a strikeout looking. He is 3-1 in four starts since the Urban Tribe acquired him from Boston on July 31.

Even with the one-sided score, there was a save. John Kelly earned his second career save and first this season by pitching a scoreless inning.

As good as the offense was, the defense might have even been better. The UT was snagging line drives like they were wearing flypaper. Marathon running Melissa took a smash right at her hands and held on despite the wicked speed. Gabby also was unstoppable at short and Christy just missed doubling up a sliding Emmit player at second base. Architect made a diving grab and Ryan let nothing get past him in center. He even took a low blow which made him glad he wears a cup in kickball.

This week’s game is at 8 pm as the Urban Tribe tries to continue their winning ways against the only remaining undefeated team in the league.

“If we play like we did today,” said Ryan, “there’s no way anyone can beat us.”

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Urban Tribe Gets Bounced By Japan

September 22, 2009

CHICAGO – A shorthanded, soundless and sober Urban Tribe (1-1) got behind early and wasn’t able to come back against a heavily fortified We Are Huge in Japan (2-0).  When it was over, they suffered their first defeat of the season losing 5-12.

Trouble for the UT started early when they found themselves in an 8 run hole after only three innings.

“Our legs were cold early in the game,” explained team coach Joggler.  The UT was stymied in the first three innings getting no runs, hits or even walks. Scoring for them was harder than getting a Republican to support a public option for the health care system.

“I don’t know what was wrong.  The wind was pretty fierce,” said rookie New Christine who kicked the ball hard but only had one hit to show for it.  “We’ll get ‘em next time.”

The wind also made every hit to the outfield an adventure.  Balls were moving like uncontrolled parachuting Elvises.  At one point a ball kicked to left field had Ditka dancing around like someone trying out for this season’s Dancing With the Stars.

“It was tricky out there,” said Ditka.  “Plus I was still shaken from a prank call I received from Gould this afternoon.”

The errors piled up in the first few innings and Huge in Japan batted around in the second inning.

After that, the UT pulled it together and put out a great defensive effort.  First timer Lindsay caught everything hit her way and Gabby and New Christine hooked up for numerous force plays at second.  Gould had a couple catches at first and Joggler even managed to strike out a guy looking!  The Brewmaster got a real workout at third snagging ball after ball that was booted his way.

“I had so many hit my way I felt like a Kardashian trying to land a husband,” he retorted.

Brewmaster and the rest of the UT offense woke up after the third inning.  He had 3 hits and scored 2 runs.  Gabby also had 3 hits and more importantly, 2 RBIs.  Lead-off man Ryan got things going with 2 hits and 2 runs scored.  Other offense leaders included Lindsay, Gould and the Joggler each with 2 hits.  If you could erase the first three innings, the Urban Tribe would’ve been victorious!  But alas, some things you can’t take back.  Just ask John Edwards and his new love child.

In the end, the Urban Tribe members were resigned.

“We just didn’t get it done today,” sighed Melissa as she gulped down her second beer at Take 5.  “But there’s another game next week. With our full team, we win that game easy.”

The Urban Tribe tries to rebound next week at 9:15.  Come out and cheer them on.

Urban Tribe Mawls the Ballers

September 10, 2009

CHICAGO – While the departure of summer brings sadness to some, it sparks excitement for kickball enthusiasts around the city.  The Urban Tribe dusted off their cleats, embraced their rubber balls, and began anew their quest to become the Greatest Kickball Team in the Universe!

“We’re just happy to be back,” said team GM Denim. “With all the pregnancies and off-field hook-ups, we weren’t even sure what our lineup would look like tonight.”pregnant kickball

The re-tooled UT welcomed three new girls to the team including Christine, Melissa, and Lindsay.  The team was waiting for new nicknames to clear waivers so forenames continued to be used.

“Sometimes nicknames just don’t make it out of pre-season,” The Architect explained.  “Apparently neither does the intro music, beer, or Porn Star.”

The UT (1-0) was pitted against the Ballers (0-1), an expansion team who didn’t realize at least 9 players are needed to field a full team.

While a Congressman was calling the President a liar the UT was busy schooling the Ballers in the fine art of propelling a rubber ball through a humid atmosphere.  They erupted for 13 runs in the first four innings getting multiple hits from Ryan, John Kelly, Christy, Gould, Melissa, Ditka and the Joggler.

Gould nearly joined the Joggler & Ditka in the home run club, but was hit in the back with the ball as he scampered home.  “Gotta be honest,” panted Gould, “my training slipped a little in the off-season.  I wasn’t quite ready to go all 240 feet on that one.”

It seemed he wasn’t the only UT member affected by the layoff.  Their typical stellar defense sprang a leak in the later innings, which allowed the Ballers to score 4 unearned runs.

“It’s early in the season, we’ll get better” quipped Brewmaster who struggled at the plate but made a fantastic diving grab on a ball to squelch the opponent’s third inning rally.

Second year UT member Gabby agreed.  “I felt a little sluggish out there,” she said.  “I thought maybe I’d loose the last 7 pounds of pregnancy weight tonight.”

But fatigue was not the only thing working against the UT in the final few innings.  A new umpire missed a couple of easy calls.  And at least one member of the UT was shaken when they overheard a spectator on his cell phone saying, “She goes, ‘I know you like spanking me.’ I said, ‘Yeah, that’s ’cause you’re such a bad girl.'”

The stands were packed with UT supporters that included a baby, an inquisitive toddler, an affable canine, a top-notch golfer, and the feisty K-Ron who’s sitting out on the DL this season.  The UT will definitely miss her muscle in any late season rumbles.

In the end, the Urban Tribe was victorious 13-8, marking the fifth straight year they opened the season with a win.  They look to continue their winning ways next week on 9/17.